Book review: 'A.D. 33' by Ted Dekker

A.D. 33 is a novel written by bestselling author Ted Dekker. This novel is the sequel to A.D. 30 which was one of the best novels I had ever read, except that I didn't like the Mortal Kombat style ending where Shao Kahn shouts “Finish him!” and Maviah says “Naaah!”...... But let’s move on. The story of A.D. 30 is of an Arabian woman named Maviah. Despite being a member of a royal Bedouin household, Maviah is looked down upon because she is a woman, and also because she has a child out of wedlock, and when bloodthirsty invaders destroy whatever little she has, she seeks out a certain carpenter from Palestine. She learns from this carpenter the power of faith, and with this faith she not only restores her dignity and wins loyal friends, but also becomes the ‘Queen of outcasts.’

A.D. 33 continues Maviah’s tale. Maviah is now the leader of her people, but she still has to deal with the invaders who had ravaged her homeland and left her people homeless. Her enemies, furious at her victory over them, strike again and deceive her people, leaving them scattered in the brutal desert of Arabia. Hence, Maviah is once again faced with overwhelming odds, and once again she has no choice but to return to Palestine in search of the famous carpenter prophet of the Jews.

As usual, Ted Dekker fills his pages with suspense and action. He throws us deep headfirst into the savage and cruel world of first century Arabia. His minimal descriptive style works perfectly. But it is the heroine who keeps the reader invested in the story. Maviah is a brilliantly written character. She is not a cardboard cut-out female lead that so often emerges from Hollywood movies; she is thoroughly human. We care for her because she is vulnerable despite being courageous. When Maviah is forced to lose everything she holds dear, she has a crisis of faith. She breaks down during times of utter defeat and humiliation. This makes her a very relatable character. The problems she faces, the uphill battle against principalities and darkness, can so often be our own. Her companion, the feared warrior Saba, is also evolving wonderfully as the story progresses. He becomes a great admirer of Yeshua and ponders a lot on this enigmatic prophet’s teachings. Judah, another returning character, is, as usual, the heroic Jewish zealot who wants to free his homeland from the clutches of Caesar. He and Saba are Maviah’s closest friends and faithful allies. A welcome addition to the cast is Talya, Maviah’s adopted son. All of the major characters, except the antagonists, are handled beautifully and with care. There are some questionable decisions that were taken with some of characters, but I won't spell them out here and spoil the plot. You’ll probably know it when you see them.

The antagonists could have benefited from a little more depth. They are shown to be somewhat one dimensional, but I guess Dekker will work on that in the planned third follow up. Another odd decision made by the author is the repeated switching between first person and third person narratives, but then again this doesn’t obstruct the storytelling in any way. The only serious complaint I have about A.D. 33 is how similar the story is to A.D. 30.

Dekker shows great respect for scripture. The biblical characters are handled very well; nothing overambitious is attempted through them. I admire that. Too many creative nonsense can often leave the reader amused or scratching their heads (cough... The last temptation of Christ...cough). Thankfully, A.D. 33 is refreshing and it does not have any of the self-indulging passages common with most authors who set out to tackle a biblical story.

Maviah’s battle of faith and outright doubt is very relevant. Like Maviah, many young people face spiritual crisis in their lives. And so often, these young people leave the church simply because of the church's inability to guide them. Also, we learn how rash and reckless decisions, often made on the basis of hyper self-reliance, can lead to disastrous consequences. During critical times, Maviah is left without any options; she has only God to rely upon, and in these moments she performs extraordinary feats and finds her true self. By showing this, Dekker illustrates beautifully how we are strong when we are weak.

Despite a few nitpicks, A.D. 33 is another Ted Dekker novel that I fairly enjoyed. The pages just begged to be kept turning every time I opened this book. It was a thrill-ride all the way. I can't wait for the third installment.

Agape

The following is a transcript of a sermon I gave in Mumbai Church of Christ:

What is Agape?

Agape means love. But it is not the kind of ‘love’ that you generally see in movies, songs, media, etc. The ‘love’ that is portrayed in the world is selfish, self-preserving and self-assuring among other things. Agape is not that kind of love.

What is Agape love like?

Agape is a Greek word which is used in the New Testament. It stands for Godly love. What is this ‘Godly love’? Whatever it is, Ephesians 3:19 says it surpasses knowledge. For us to understand this, let us read a very familiar passage for the Gospel of John.

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting love. – John 3:16

The love that is described here is Agape love. Notice that God did not hold back anything, even his own Son, when he showed his love for mankind.

The ‘love’ that we find in this world is like me saying, “Listen, I’ll care for you and do anything you may need. But, you’ll have to do the same for me.” No, that’s not what God is doing. God, instead of looking out for his own interest, looks out for our interest. And in doing so he gives his only son to be butchered by our hands… so that we may have everlasting life.

Want to know what worldly ‘love’ is like? Listen to me…

‘Love’ is impatient, ‘love’ is rude and always jealous, ‘love’ always keeps on bragging and is arrogant, and it is always self-preserving, it is easily provoked, it does not care if anyone is suffering, in fact, it rejoices when there is something bad going on, it does not bear anything at all.

Want to know what Agape love is like? Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

So you see, Agape love and worldly love are two things which are completely opposite to each other. Agape love, for one thing, does not recognize man-made distinctions. That is why, even though we are worthless, God considers are worthy. 

For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything, but faith working through love. – Galatians 5:6

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8

Worldly love says, ‘I can do whatever I want… whenever I want.’ Agape love, on the other hand, does not abuse freedom.

For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. – Galatians 5:13

So how can we experience this self-sacrificing, self-denying kind of love? It’s very simple. Look to Jesus.

Jesus is the perfect example of Agape. Everything that he did, in his earthly life, was an act of love. 

When he was born to a poor earthly family and gave Mary the honor of being his mother, it was an act of love. 

When he turned water into wine at Cana, it was an act of love. 

When he commanded us to love our enemies, it was an act of love. 

When he blessed the little children, it was an act of love. 

When he cleansed the leper, it was an act of love. 

When he made the blind see, it was an act of love. 

When he rebuked the Pharisees, it was an act of love. 

When he spoke to the Samaritan women, it was an act of love. 

When he raised Lazarus from the dead, it was an act of love. 

When he raised the widow’s son, it was an act of love. 

When he fed the multitude, it was an act of love. 

When he showed forgiveness to Peter for Peter’s denial, it was an act of love. 

When he died on the cross, it was the act of love.

Even before the beginning of time, Jesus, along with the Father and the Holy Spirit, has always loved. Listen to what Jesus is praying to the Father.

“O righteous Father, although the world has not known You, yet I have known You; and these have known that You sent Me; and I have made Your name known to them, and will make it known, so that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.” – John 17:26

C.S. Lewis says that this kind of love in the divine Trinity is like an eternal dance that goes on and on and on. In short, the love between Father, Son and Holy Spirit is never-ending. Now, listen to what Jesus is saying to his disciples.

"Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love. – John 15:9-10

Paul is astonished at seeing this divine love extended to us worthless human beings. He is so astonished that he wishes never to be separated from this love of Christ. Listen to what he says,

Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? – Romans 8:35

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39

How can we comprehend this kind of love? I’ll try to explain by telling you a story. There were two men, both of them were friends. The name of the first was ‘Winner’ and the name of the second was ‘Loser’. Both of them were sitting at a cafeteria drinking tea. The Winner kept on boasting about how he never lost. The Loser always remained humble. The Winner noticed that the Loser had an envelope in his hand.

“What is that in your hand?” The Winner asked.

“This?” The Loser raised his envelope. “I’ll show you but first you’ll have to answer my riddle.”

The Winner was eager for the challenge. “All right, tell me the riddle and I will see what is in that envelope.”

“Oh, but you will have to lose this riddle to get the prize,” said the Loser.

“What do you mean?”

“You can’t win this riddle.” The Loser said just like that.

“Ha! You can keep your ‘prize’ because I will answer the riddle.” The Winner said confidently.

“All right here’s the riddle:

“I became poor so that you can be rich

Hungry so that you can be filled

Lowly so that you can be elevated

Filthy so that you can be clean

Sin so that you can be pure

Dead so that you can be alive.”

“That’s nonsense!” The Winner cried.

“Here’s the envelope” The Loser said.

The Winner was disturbed, but he wasn't going to give up. He took that envelope and went home, but he didn't open it. For days, he tried to solve the riddle. He calculated and reasoned night and day. Sometimes, he even went without food, trying to make sense of the riddle. Finally he broke down. He was devastated. He was heartbroken. He realized that he could not solve the riddle. Hence, he was no longer ‘the Winner’. He became, like his friend, a ‘Loser’. He started to cry. He picked up a piece of paper and wrote on it.

I am nothing.

Finally he took the envelope, and he opened it. Inside was a piece of paper, a very small piece. There were some words on it. Want to know what was written on the paper?

“Love one another, just as I have loved you.” – John 13:34

First, the man was shocked at reading this. Was this another riddle? But soon something opened up his mind. It was like a bolt of lightning. The riddle, he realized, was about Agape. The answer to the riddle was none other than Jesus Christ! He was astonished.

Then something wonderful started to happen. Finally, everything made sense. By losing, this man had actually solved the riddle! He was now a ‘Winner’ again. The love of Jesus Christ has made him whole. The Winner was filled with joy.

Far away, the Loser was reading the newspaper and enjoying his cup of his tea. Then suddenly his phone began to ring. The Loser had a big smile on his face. He knew who was calling.

"By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." – John 13:35

The influence of Jesus Christ on mankind (Part III)

Before reading this blog post it is highly recommended that you read the previous two posts.
Part I
Part II

It is clear that Jesus Christ has changed the world ever since his earthly life, death and resurrection. Every sphere of human life has been influenced by this man who treaded the sands of Israel thousands of years ago. Thanks to this Galilean there is a new morality in human minds.

Now that Christ has been established as the single most influential personality in the world, should he be dismissed as being just that? Isn't he so much more than just that?

When we read the words of Christ found in the New Testament, we read Christ's demand for us to follow him.

"If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me." (Matthew 16:24 NASB)

Deny himself? Even Jesus' brothers thought he was out of his mind to make demands like these (Mark 3:21).James and Jude were both brothers of Jesus, they thought he was crazy and utterly delusional (John 7:5). But something happened later on in their lives. Both James and Jude had written letters to churches, and in both their letters look at how they were describing themselves.

James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations: Greetings. (James 1:1 NIV)

Jude, a servant of Jesus Christ and a brother of James... (Jude 1:1 NIV)

Servants of Jesus! What happened? What could have caused these two brothers, brothers of the Lord, from being utterly in denial to being bond-servants of the Lord Jesus?

Christ taught a new morality, yes. He was also himself the new morality, the new Adam, the firstborn from the dead. He fed the hungry (Matt. 14), he healed the sick (Luke 17), he preached the gospel to the poor (Luke 4:18), he gave sight to the blind (John 9), he raised the dead (John 11), and finally, he died for our sins - bridging the great gulf between man and God - and he rose from the dead. He is now alive and still in control.

Christ beckons us to him so that our lives may be transformed, our perceptions may be altered, and we become a new creation altogether. His transforming nature is itself evident in the story of mankind, and his influence on mankind is nothing but a sample to the greater influence that is in him.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! (2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV)

Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. (Colossians 3:11 NIV)

The influence of Jesus Christ on mankind (Part II)

In twenty years Christianity will be no more. My single hand shall destroy the edifice it took twelve apostles to rear. - Voltaire

Voltaire threw this direct challenge at the heart of Christianity in Western Europe during the Renaissance era. The Renaissance was the age of 'enlightenment' - it was supposedly that time when humanity threw aside superstition and backward thinking and replaced them with reason and free thinking. Voltaire, writer and philosopher, was one of the pioneers of the Renaissance, and he was no fan of Christ. So convinced was he of the effect of the Renaissance on Christianity that he made a bold prediction of Christianity's extinction in no more than 'twenty years'.

Unfortunately, Voltaire's prediction did not come true. The Bible itself inspired the invention of the printing press by Johannes Gutenberg in 1450 which in turn printed more copies of the Bible. Jesus' words were now translated in many languages, printed in greater numbers and distributed all over the world.

Christ in arts

Leonardo Da Vinci's 'The Last Supper'

Some of the most famous paintings in the history of arts were made under the influence of Jesus Christ. Famous artists like Leonardo Da Vinci, Raphael and Boticelli all depicted Christ in their paintings. Depictions of Jesus in arts surged, especially during the Renaissance era.

Vincent Van Gogh (1853 - 1890), a pioneer of post-Impressionist painting, was probably the most influential artist of all time. He wrote in a letter that Jesus Christ was the ultimate artist.

Van Gogh's Pieta

Christ alone, of all the philosophers, magicians, etc., has affirmed eternal life as the most important certainty, the infinity of time, the futility of death, the necessity and purpose of serenity and devotion. He lived serenely, as an artist greater than all other artists, scorning marble and clay and paint, working in the living flesh. In other words, this peerless artist, scarcely conceivable with the blunt instrument of our modern, nervous and obtuse brains, made neither statues nor paintings nor books. He maintained in no uncertain terms that he made…living men, immortals. - Vincent Van Gogh

Music composers often wrote music based on the themes of the Bible, especially on Jesus. One such composer was Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (1756 - 1791) who wrote the 'Requiem Mass in D minor'.

American composer Leonard Bernstein (1918 - 1990) was another musician moved by Biblical themes. His "The Chichester Psalms" are famous for incorporating the Psalms of David as songs of peace.

A whole genre of Spiritual music, mainly Blues and Negro Spirituals, was created for Jesus by the African community enslaved in American. This genre would later give birth to 'Rock n roll' music in the 50s popularized by Elvis Presley, a gospel singer himself.

One of the most famous and influential musicians of our times is Robert Zimmerman, a.k.a Bob Dylan. Dylan is an American musician, singer and song-writer.

Bob Dylan

Probably the most thought provoking song-writers of his time, Dylan wrote the following lyrics.

You may be an ambassador to England or France
You may like to gamble, you might like to dance
You may be the heavyweight champion of the world
You may be a socialite with a long string of pearls.

But you're gonna have to serve somebody, yes indeed
You're gonna have to serve somebody,
It may be the devil or it may be the Lord
But you're gonna have to serve somebody.

Dylan would recall after his coming to Christ in 1978:

“Jesus tapped me on the shoulder and said, 'Bob, why are you resisting me?' I said, 'I'm not resisting You!' He said, 'You gonna follow Me?' I said, 'I've never thought about that before!' He said, 'When you're not following Me. you're resisting Me.”

His lyrics from then onward, especially in 1979's 'Slow Train Coming', would frequently refer to his transformation due to Christ.

Country singing icon Johnny Cash (1932 - 2003) was known for his outspoken belief in Jesus as his savior. Before he became a country music sensation, Cash was first and foremost a gospel singer. He produced songs for a movie on Jesus called 'The Gospel Road' and wrote a novel on the apostle Paul called 'The Man in White'.

He said,

The Master of Life's been good to me. He has given me strength to face past illnesses, and victory in the face of defeat. He has given me life and joy where other saw oblivion. He Has given new purpose to live for, new services to render and old wounds to heal. Life and love go on, let the music play.

Christ in Motion Pictures

A scene from 'Ben Hur'

Movies on Jesus such as 'The Greatest Story Ever Told', 'Ben Hur', and 'Passion of the Christ', are landmark achievements in the art of motion pictures. The Charlton Heston starrer 'Ben Hur' (1959) holds the record for most Academy Awards won (eleven) by a motion picture. 'The Passion of the Christ' (2004) is perhaps the most controversial movie, alongside 'The Last Temptation of Christ' (1988), to be made about Jesus Christ.

Movies about Jesus continue to be made even today, the most recent being 'Son of God'. Many directors have made their own Jesus films, each with their own thoughts and ideas. For example, Pier Pasolini made a movie showing Jesus as an uncompromising champion of the poor and the oppressed.

Voltaire again

After seeing the numerous ways Christ has impacted every sphere of life around us, it is difficult to take Voltaire seriously. Today, Jesus is as influential as never before. His words are quoted frequently, often heralding revolutionary changes wherever they are uttered, and his personality still endears to many.

As we move on to part three we will come to know why Christ's words, as evident from its transforming nature, should be heeded and not ignored.

The influence of Jesus Christ on mankind (Part I)

I am an historian, I am not a believer, but I must confess as a historian that this penniless preacher from Nazareth is irrevocably the very center of history. Jesus Christ is easily the most dominant figure in all history.- H.G. Wells, British Historian and Novelist

Little did anyone know in the time of Christ that this man would single-handedly change the course of human history. Many skeptics argue that the impact of Jesus - no doubt a great man - is often exaggerated by his followers. One of the skeptic's claims is that it was Paul, not Jesus, who is largely responsible for the spread of Christianity. This claim itself comes under doubt once we find the meaning of the word 'influence'. Surely Paul had a burning motive - or rather an 'engine' - that propelled him to spread the Gospel all over Europe and Asia Minor. Paul's engine was none other than Jesus Christ as is evident from his letters to the first century churches. He says to the church in Galatia,

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20 NIV)

The non-violent movement

So how did Christ influence the world? After he lived his earthly life Christ introduced radical principals by which his followers lived. In Europe, the Roman empire severely cracked down on the disciples of Christ because of the refusal of Christians to bow down and worship Caesar. They were hacked down, burned, scourged, crucified, beheaded and thrown to the lions. But the Christians did not retaliate. History has it that the Christians, despite suffering greatly under the empire, actually helped their Roman and Greek neighbors in times of trouble. The Romans were astonished at this non-violent behavior from Christians.

Leo Tolstoy

In 1894, Leo Tolstoy - famed author (War and Peace, Anna Karenina) - wrote a book called 'The Kingdom of God Is Within You'. In this book Tolstoy underlined the non-violent principles of Jesus Christ and it's effectiveness. He gave his book to a certain Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, an Indian lawyer living in South Africa, who used it to fight the British Empire. Gandhi's non-violent resistance left the British shell-shocked and eventually India became independent as a result of his commitment to the passive resistance method.

Later. in 1960s, Martin Luther King would adopt similar means in his campaign for racial equality in the United States. He said, "Christ showed me the way, Gandhi showed me the method."

Causes of the oppressed

The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor. (Luke 4:18-19 NIV)

These were the words Jesus spoke at the time of his ministry. Before Christ came, it was considered normal to abuse human rights, to violate agreements between each other, to bully the weakling and show utter ruthlessness. The Roman Empire stood for everything of the twisted nature of mankind, it was a glorified celebration of the fall of man. Then in 1st century Anno Domini, a man called Jesus was born into a poor family of Roman occupied Palestine. This man, a Jew, challenged the very notion of Empire by feeding the hungry, healing the sick and giving sight to the blind. This man promoted compassion, charity, humanitarianism, universal brotherhood and, above all, love for all. These qualities were all but nonexistent during the reign of Caesar, but after the ascension of Christ they spread like wildfire.

William Wilberforce

As time went on and the message of Christ spread further and further, human morality seemed to have evolved as is evident in the fabric of history. Slavery, considered normal in many parts of the world, began to be despised. William Wilberforce (1759 - 1833), an Englishman and a devout follower of Christ, started an intense political campaign to rid the British Isles of slavery. Taking inspiration from Jesus' undying determination, Wilberforce, after scores of failures, finally succeeded in abolishing slavery. The United States of America would follow suit.

Today, there are countless numbers of organizations like Amnesty International and the One Campaign dedicated to social justice and humanitarianism around the world. Thanks to Jesus, bullying the weak is no longer considered normal by a large portion of humanity. Thanks to Jesus, there is such a thing called social justice.

Science

"I believe only and alone in the service of Jesus Christ. In him is all refuge and solace." - Johannes Kepler (1571-1630) German Astronomer

The field of science has been no less touched by the hand of Jesus Christ. Pioneers and visionaries such as Isaac Newton, Galileo and Leonardo Da Vinci had felt the influence of Christ on their works. Many scientists today have felt the truth of Christ in their research and discoveries.

As a child I received instruction both in the Bible and in the Talmud. I am a Jew, but I am enthralled by the luminous figure of the Nazarene....No one can read the Gospels without feeling the actual presence of Jesus. His personality pulsates in every word. No myth is filled with such life. - Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955) German-born physicist

Forgiveness

This past week I watched 'The Railway Man', a movie, based on a true story, depicting the traumatic experience and aftermath of a British soldier in a Japanese POW camp during World War II. The highlight of the movie was how the British prisoner - Eric Lomax - endured severe brutality at the hands of Japanese interrogators and still found courage, years after the war, to forgive one of his tormentors.

This made me think of an incident in the gospel when Peter asked Jesus, "How many times should we forgive those who sin against us?" Forgiving someone, especially one who has caused us harm that is not easy to forget, is very hard. Yet forgiveness is one of Christ's most radical messages to humanity, one that will effectively transform our world if embraced by all.

Consider how Christ was beaten, scourged and crucified to death by the people of his day. A doctor describes the crucifixion below:

The patibulum was put on the ground and the victim laid upon it. Nails, about 7 inches long and with a diameter of 1 cm ( roughly 3/8 of an inch) were driven in the wrists. The points would go into the vicinity of the median nerve, causing shocks of pain to radiate through the arms. It was possible to place the nails between the bones so that no fractures (or broken bones) occurred. Studies have shown that nails were probably driven through the small bones of the wrist, since nails in the palms of the hand would not support the weight of a body. In ancient terminology, the wrist was considered to be part of the hand. (Davis) Standing at the crucifixion sites would be upright posts, called stipes, standing about 7 feet high.(Edwards) In the center of the stipes was a crude seat, called a sedile or sedulum, which served a support for the victim. The patibulum was then lifted on to the stipes. The feet were then nailed to the stipes. To allow for this, the knees had to be bent and rotated laterally, being left in a very uncomfortable position. The titulus was hung above the victim's head. (Complete article here)

Even though Christ suffered some of the most severest agonies every devised by man, he still uttered these unforgettable words on the cross:

"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34 NIV)

Peter asked, “Master, how many times do I forgive a brother or sister who hurts me? Seven?”
Jesus replied, “Seven! Hardly. Try seventy times seven." (Matt. 18:21-22 MSG)

Forgiveness is essential in our quest to be Christ-like. Henri Nouwen said: Forgiveness is the well at the center of God’s Village. It is the antidote to the world's bacterial miseries. It sets apart God's kingdom from man's kingdom. It is the one thing that defined Christ's message to an unforgiving creation.

A tale of two traitors

When Jesus was arrested two of his disciples - Peter and Judas Iscariot - were guilty of denying and betraying their Master. Judas' betrayal is obvious, he is incredibly dissatisfied with his Master when a woman lovingly anointed Jesus with expensive perfume. Judas argued that the perfume could have been spent on the poor (as if Judas was concerned about the poor) only for Jesus to rebuke him and praise the woman. (Matt. 26)

Peter, on the other hand, was found making bold statements, for example he said he would rather 'die' than betray his Savior. At the hour of reckoning both Peter and Judas abandoned Jesus in every way possible. Judas betrayed his Lord to the religious authority for thirty pieces of silver. Peter denied the Lord in front of a crowd gathered at the trial. Both had sinned and both cried bitterly over it.

The reactions of these two disciples in relation to their sins are something for a Christian to take note of in his/her life following Jesus. At times we end up committing a grave sin against our fellow man or God, and we think that the Lord is unforgiving and vengeful towards us for it. A look at this episode of Peter and Judas tells us something different from what our carnal mind so often conceives about God.

Judas was disgusted with himself, 'I betrayed innocent blood' he said. He tries to return the 'blood money' to the Pharisees and runs away. Here, he is tormented with guilt by Satan and is eventually driven towards suicide. Judas' fate reminds us why we are wrong to judge God's forgiveness as limited in its reach and select to only a few. In the end it was Judas himself who was unforgiving rather than God.

Peter was equally upset over his denial but he still hung out with the other apostles. He waited and waited, and when he heard of Jesus' resurrection he literally ran into the empty tomb. The ever impulsive Peter still had a glimmer of hope inside him that Christ was ready to forgive. And how right he was! Peter jumped from his boat and into the water, he swam to the shore to reach where his friend - the Lord Jesus - stood. (John 21:7)

God, as revealed by his Son Jesus, is ever patient in his forgiveness. When Jesus and Simon Peter were reconciled the two had this interesting conversation with each other.

When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”

“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”

Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”

The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. (John 21:15-17 NIV)